Quick Updates

As the month of March rolls into its second full week, it it occurs to me that our baby puzzle updates have been short coming as of late.  That is simply because there has been little change to our cases.  We are still waiting for an adoption date for LR.  We should hear something soon.  B-Rad and sister’s court date is April 11.  

The kiddos are doing well.  We are learning lots of words.  Personalities are coming through.  We love seeing the little  changes that make them who they are.  We will keep everyone up to date as soon as we hear.

Below is a quick YouTube of the Littles and their 2016.  Thank you for reading.

http://youtu.be/wC_R4QQiXyM

Groundhog Day 2016

Today is Groundhog Day.  I cannot go a single Groundhog Day without thinking about Bill Murrey and his desperate to escape living through a day that repeats it’s self without end.  He tried so very hard to get it right, then he tried so very hard to get it wrong and still he would wake to hear Sonny and Cher sing their love ballad.  

Well if you didn’t hear on the news, the groundhog did not see his shadow which tradition and lore tells us it will be an early spring.  Why is that tradition?  Why do we except it as fact?  How in the world does one relate to the other?  I have heard and read sever different explanation, but at the end I still wonder why?  Why except things as fact just because that is how they have been?

As we posted, LR’s bio-parent’s rights were severed.  Cheryl and I have contacted our licensing agency and an adoption attorney.  From the best we can tell it will be about 4 weeks (so around the beginning of March) before our home is an “approved” adoptive home.  It will then be about sixty to ninety days before the adoption date can be set (so somewhere in the start to mid May).

I can say with certainty that I am naive about the process that we were to go to for the adoption.  It feels like the more paperwork we fill out the more we are asked to fill out.  It feels like the closer to the end we walk the further away the date gets.  I don’t believe that my own genius is anywhere close to the comic genius of Mr. Murray, but at the same time it feels a little like I imagined as a young adult that the character it Groundhog Day was experiencing.  

Today we recived an email from our licensing agency with changed to the licensing requirements.  Lots of changes have been happening to AZ foster care system ever since we have been involved. With the changes we see at least two areas that will most likely need to change to maintain our licenses.  For me the safety and well being of the children is the most important thing.  However the changes seem less about a practical application and more about changing things just so it is different.  Why continue to throw hoops and hurdles.  We are trying our hardest.  The changes were supposed to give more support to the families and the children.  The largest change I have seen has been a change it leadership reporting, very little to assist the children.  Why do we settle for things to stay the same just because they are tradition or lore?  Why can’t improvements be made at the practical level?  We don’t need more hoops, we needs more supports.

Thank you for reading.  I will post an update as we hear back from our adoptive lawyer and when we meet our new case worker.  Happy Groundhog Day.

Our Day at Court

Today was LR’s next court date.  We arrived to court about 30 minutes early.  You never know how long traffic will take so we left a little early.  Walking into the court house we go through a metal protector and make our way down to the court room.  It is a long hallway and there are other court rooms on the way.  Lots of people and families trying to make their own ways through the system.  Finally we make it to outside our court room and find two seats together.  

We sat and waited, people watching.  I wondered to myself the many stories that brought them here.  About twenty minutes of waiting we finally see a fimiliar face, the bio mom’s attorney.  She stops and asks us if we have seen the bio mom, we had not.  She merges back into the crowd looking for her client. A few minutes later we see the GAL.  Before making her way over to us, the GAL stops and talks with the the mom’s attorney.    

In the hand of the bio mom’s attorney was a piece of paper; the two attorney talked about its contents for a few minutes.  Finally the bio mom’s attorney gets up and leaves.  We get a chance to talk with the GAL and she says that the document was a concent letter to severe bio mom’s rights.  Cheryl and I have a moment of a sigh of relief.

We go back to waiting 10:30 ( the court time comes and goes).  Time creeps to 10:50 and the court room sign clicks off.  A feel a lump in my throat as the court room attendant comes out and calls for a different case.  Repeat 11:25 same lump same results, another case and again at 11:40 and again at 11:55.  By this point the crowd has wind led down to just the people in our case.

Finally 2:15 and we are called in.  The proceedings are fairly technical, but by the end the judge made the ruling that the bio mom’s rights would be severed.  Now, we are onto adoptions.  We have all ready contacted our lawyer.  We will have to wait to be assigned a new DCS worker for adoption.  From what we have heard, the process and timing takes about 3 months.  However, as we have learned over the years, time may take longer.  We will keep you posted.  Thanks for reading

Making Traditions

This holiday season has been another good one.  Cheryl says, “I love watching the kiddos discover the Christmas season.”  The kiddos get excited seeing so many things.  Every time they see the out door lights we have a barrage of “wows” and “look, look”.  They get excited with every Christmas tree they see.  B-Rad loves to declare “ho-ho-ho”.  

Christmas Eve we hopped in the car and went looking at the lights on the neighborhood homes.  Christmas morning we woke up and had breakfast.  The kiddos opened their stockings at their high chairs.  After, the kiddos opened many of their gifts.  In the afternoon time family came by for short greetings and then more for dinner.  In all, it was a good day.

Some things we did we plan to make into a tradition.  Giving the kiddos memories and making traditions has been good.
Thanks for reading.  To come in the new year we hope to have more updates of the permanent persuasion.

Second Anniversary

Today is the anniversary of Cheryl and I accepting into our home two foster kiddos for our very first “parenting” experience.  Lots has changed in that time and I know that our lives are forever changed because of it.  We hope that the kiddos who have come to live with us for whatever length have had their lives enhanced from the time that they were with us.  Other parents would call this a “birthday”.  There was no birth.  I guess to the ones we have cared for and to my loving wife, I wish you all blessed foster day.

Update After Court

Today we went to court for LR.  Before the hearing in the court room.  We had a mediation between the state, biomom and ourselves.  LR’s mom says she wants to give up her parental rights and requests photos and possible future contact.  Which was conveyed in the court room.  Additionally, because the biomom’s attorney had not given her a few documents, the servence hearing was continued.  That means we have a new court date of January 19 @ 10:30.

After the hearing the judge asked us for more photos.  At that time he told us that when the adoption hearing happens we could request for him to be the judge.  

Still lots of things to come and not as much as we thought was going to happen.  Slow like the turtle, not quick like the rabbit. 

I took the above photo while we were waiting for mediation.  
Thanks for reading 

 

Black Friday

“It’s different when they are your’s”.  

Two years and a few months ago, Cheryl and I had the fortunate encounter of listening to friends talk about their own experience as foster and later adoptive parents.  Long time readers might remember me writing about them.  They showed us the path to fostering and took our baby puzzle blog in a whole new direction.  They explained to Cheryl when she asked, “when did you feel like they were yours?”  “Oh honey, they were never mine, they were gifts from God, we just got a chance to take care of them for a little while.”

On our Balck Friday we head to the stores in search of new possessions.  New things that we can own.  New things we can manipulate and change.  New things that are ours.  They can be held as a shiny new object.  They can be thrown away without  a second look.  On this glorious discounted day we search for the deal of a life time.  We search for things we can possess, things we can own.

Humans cannot be owned.  “It’s different when they are your’s”.  I was raised by an adopted mom.  My dad was raised by adopted dad.  The children who are placements in our home cannot be thrown away without a second look, therefore they are not our possession, but gifts from God.  

Today, yes even on Black Friday, I am happy for things that I still long for.  Many of my things are not able to be bought at a store.  Today I am happy to know that God has given me many gifts.  Today, I am happy to be reminded that family and friends alike, have given goods examples of the gifts I have been afforded.  While others still believe “It’s different when they are your’s”, I know the things that truly matter in life are not those things that I own, they are not things I can throw away or dismiss, they are something much different then any Black Friday sale can provide

Today, remember what you were thankful for yesterday.  Happy Black Friday!

Turkey Tuesday Thanks

As we prepare for the holiday coming this Thursday, it leads me to be introspective about the things we have experienced and are thankful for.  2015 has been another unique year.  I am thankful for many things and I am sure that if I sat listing them all it may sound like everything in my life.  Here are three things for our “Turkey Tuesday”.

Since last Thanksgiving, Cheryl and I have said goodbye to two of our three placements, hello to two new kiddos and grown closer to our three current placements.  I am very thankful for the many gifts that each child gives us.  They all have their own personalities, but in their own unique way they show us what it means to love and be loved.  They grow and discover the world around them and as they do they remind me of the simple things in our lives that are just as important as the more complicated ones.  Seeing the world through a child’s eye has a certain level of innocence and can un-complicate a complicated decision without even trying.  I am very thankful for our three little ones with us and the two littles back home with their families.

My second Turkey Tuesday Thanks is from back in April. I spent 16 days in the hospital and another two weeks on “couch rest”.  During that time a lot of the slack I left behind had to be picked up.  Some of the slack was by family, some by co-workers and a whole lot by my loving wife.  Cheryl was a rock who went to work, came home and took care of our kiddos and found time to take care of her emotionally fragile husband.  I am thankful for the family and friends who lent her a hand in taking care of the kiddos, of the house, the dogs, and her.  Cheryl went to bat for me, making sure the doctors were on track, she slept on hard chairs and she held me up.  This Thanksgiving, I am thankful for all of the slack pickers in my time of need.

The third Turkey Tuesday Thanks is for the many coming changes that Cheryl and I anticipate in the coming year.  We feel like we will have a more clear understanding what our “baby puzzle” picture will look like.  We have been working feverishly to set ourselves up for our “domestic dad” plan and we will have a more active role in forming the people our littles are becoming.  Every year there is change and I know that nothing is ever static.  Having a chance to live out our goals and our plans makes me thankful.

So, from the Covert’s house and my own blogging desk, I want to wish you a very happy and healthy Thanksgiving.  And that you may remember to remember the many blessings in your life.  Happy Thanksgiving.

Little Roo Slideshow

In 27 days we go to court to help decide a more permanent setting for this little one. 

https://youtu.be/PQGy0HFsrjU

One Year with LR

One year ago today LR came to live with us.

We did not know her, we did not know where she had been and who she had seen.  We did not know her personality.  Her had not experienced her laugh.  We had not experienced her active tendencies.    She came to our home and changed our year and our lives.

Today we still live in limbo.  Today she has a grasp of our heart.  Today Cheryl and I wish her a very happy one year fostering anniversary.  We are very excited to see what the next year holds.