Two Will Become One, Most Likely?

At the end of April Cheryl and I had our monthly visit by our case workers for both of our kiddos.  The workers had agreed to both meet at the same time because they were coming from the same office and would be able to use the car pool lane in rush hour traffic.  It worked well for us also because it combined two meetings into one.

The monthly visits are for the purpose of the workers having contact with the kiddos.   They can see them in Cheryl and I’s home and also so they can ask about the progress of the kiddos.  There is a form of questions that we go through and by this point we know the questions that will be asked so things run pretty smoothly.  The worker for our younger kiddo went first.  Everything has been progressing well for her and the conversation went quickly.  Then the worker for our older kiddo’s worker went and we reported the same type of progress we had seen in past months.

At the end, the older kiddo’s worker told us that by the end of May he would be going to live with relatives.  The worker told us that she did not have more details for us, but that she would let us know as the time got closer.  It is good news for him as it is a mid-step back to his home.  As always, it is hard on Cheryl and I.

In the last two weeks, we have heard no further news about when the transfer will happen.  We understand that the logistics take a lot to hammer out and that it all does not happen overnight.  Still, it is hard to feel like we are an afterthought to the communication loop.

On a side note, our kiddo who went to live with his dad in early April will be coming over this weekend to visit.  We had hoped he could visit for his sister’s birthday, but schedules did not work out.  We are excited because our now oldest placement still asks where his playmate is and when he might see him.  Transitions are so hard for these kiddos.

Thanks for reading.  Have a great day!

A Quick Update

This just a quick update…

Today our oldest foster kiddo started unsupervised visits.  This is an exciting time for him because it is a sign that re-unification is closing in.  We are very happy to see the case advance in this direction.

Much like the rest of our experiences this transition is looks and feels different than our first go around.  Instead of the parent aid transporting, our foster kiddo’s dad is picking up and dropping off at day care.  Not sure too much how I feel about other than, it is different than before.

Thanks for reading our quick update.

First

One year ago today Cheryl and I became full time foster parents.  It feels like much, much longer than just a year.  Many of the firsts that we experienced as a parenting unit happened out of order of the tradition.

We were first time parents to two children during the holiday season to one first timer himself and a second timer to another child.  I remember sitting by the tree helping a kiddo open gifts.  The first ever birthday party we threw for a kiddo we were parenting was a second birthday party; a few months later then for her brother.  We watched the first unassisted steps taken by our two year old.  I remember the excitement we felt when we finally were able to sleep through the night; the excitement for a kiddo who could sit up by himself; the excitement for a first time roll from back to tummy (we actually experienced twice this year); the excitement for a leap frog style crawl that transformed into a speed crawler; the excitement for the first time pull to stand and then cruse the furniture.  This year we even experienced the first time of being empty nesters.  Lots and lots of first time experience that we will never forget.

The thing that I will remember most about December 11, 2013 is that was a time that we thought we had lots of ideas of what to expect. December 12, 2013 at 2:34 am life and expectation changed. We expected to step into the lives of children we have never me and give them support while their care givers fortified the things in their own lives.  Beyond that we had a lot of misconception of what it would be like to parent children.  The time and energy that one puts into evening feedings cannot be described fully.  The emotional attachments that occur in a matter of days cannot be fully understood.  It was as if we had seen all of the outsides to a building and with each passing day (and yes I mean even into today) we discover new parts of that building.  We do not know what the future will hold for us or for the kiddos who are in our care, but we do know that we will discover whatever is ahead together.

Thanks for reading.